Monday, January 5, 2009

An Open Letter to the 2009 President of the Nation of Freedonia

The Right Honorable President of Freedonia
The Peoples Palace
The Nation of Freedonia

Dear Mr. President,

It has come to our attention that in recent weeks the long-strained relations between our Country and the Nation of Freedonia have finally begun to ease. We have eagerly read of the rapprochement in diplomatic relations and watched with delight the pictures of you greeting our leader at the New Year's Eve celebration you hosted at the People's Palace.

The fireworks display in the color scheme of our nation's flag, with celestial stars playing themselves, was a particularly thoughtful and moving gesture; a symbolic olive branch splashed across the midnight sky.

And while we recognize that our leader's motivation for reaching out to your nation at this time may be driven not by diplomatic intentions, but simply a pragmatic need to generate good will in time for the run up to the 2009 election, we feel that you are now in a unique position to illicit from him a kind gesture in return for your Grace's magnanimous overture.

So it is with deep gratitude and humility that we ask you to use your favored status with our leader and prevail upon him to ceremonially co-name the beloved childhood block of some gentlemen who contributed to the cultural history of your nation as well.

New Yorkers by birth and East 93rd Street residents by address, the Marx Brothers also famously blessed the Nation of Freedonia with their kinetic comic genius and global recipes for Duck Soup. In fact, we hope it's not too boastful to say that we believe the Marx Brothers put Freedonia on the map !

Should you have any lingering doubts about appealing to our leader in this regard, perhaps, you could offer to name a tiny Palace hidden somewhere in the woods for him ? He seems to like that sort of thing, so it would be a sure-fire way of sweetening the deal.

The Marx Brothers fabled rule over Freedonia was long ago. But their influence, then and now, has been profound. And if his Grace turns out to be the one who succeeds in persuading our leader to co-name their childhood block Marx Brothers Place, you will forever be remembered as a President who reached out his hand, not to seize land or power, but to honor humanity and peace.

Your Humble Admirers,

Friends & Residents of Marx Brothers Place

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